Most of us, admit it or not must have been through depression. We always get frustrated about things to the point that it leads us to the feeling of helplessness. I myself have been through a lot and I know how hard it is.
Few months ago something happened that changed the way I see life. My long term boyfriend died with Pneumonia and I just felt that my heart died together with him. It was really tough especially because he has been with me through all my struggles. And then, I’d have to face the worst things of all without him.
I have experienced several deaths in the family. In year 2016 both my grandma and father died with almost 2 months gap. And then this year, my boyfriend died too. I felt my heart has been shattered trice in a row. And that’s when I felt the depression cruising over me.
Recently, I resigned from my job because of this feeling I have inside me. I cannot focus on anything and I cannot perform my job well so I decided to quit. Certain issues affected me drastically. I got emotional most of the time. And I just felt that the world was closing in on me. I knew I needed help but I don’t want anyone to worry so I kept it to myself. I read books and blogs about depression. I search for ways on how to fight it and avoid the worst case which is killing yourself.
It was really hard but I made it. I somehow lessen that feeling with my own ways. And I’m going to share it to those who are experiencing the same.
1. Talk with your friends and family.
I noticed that most of the bad thoughts i had occured during the times that I was alone. So, it helps to always be with someone or atleast talk to someone. Even at phone or in facebook. It is even better to talk to someone personally. It really helps.
2. Develop a new hobby.
There were things that my boyfriend and I loved to do and every time I do it again, it reminds me of him and I eventually feel sad. So, one of the things I did to avoid this sad thoughts was to try new things that we didn’t usually do before. I tried reading books which we didn’t actually like doing because it is some sort of a solo thing. At first, I read a single book book for about 2 weeks until I started loving it and can now finish one within a week. It is also helpful to avoid overthinking and can even develop your vocabulary and reading skills.
3. Go out and breathe fresh air.
When my granda and father died, I thought I died too because they were the most important persons in my life. And I couldn’t believe that I won’t be able to see them again. But since, I was still in university when that happened I had no choice but to go back to my daily life which was different when my boyfriend died. I was already working and even quit my job, so I have a lot of free time for myself. That time was meant for me to relax and heal but self-pity crosses my mind too. That’s when I tried going out to different places where I can breathe fresh air. The sea and the mountains are two of my favorite places to relax. I even go to parks and just drop down to read my book. Doing things like that helped me clear my mind.
4. Always pray.
The fourth and the last in my list is to pray always. We may have different beliefs but I know that we all pray. And praying for our departed loved ones somehow free us to all the questions and bitterness we have. This is the most poweful of all the things I did. I pray first to God and then I’ll start talking to my loved ones as if they are in front of me. I just believe that they can hear whatever I’m saying and it helps me a lot. It calms me during the nights when I can’t help but feel sad. Just pray and talk to them.
So, that’s it. I hope it helped you too the way it helped me. Always remember, that in all of your battles you are never alone. Just keep on fighting and everything will fall on place in the end.
You can leave a comment below if you need to talk. I’m not a professional but talking with someone helps.
Love,
Romi xoxo